I'd like more, please.

I am not a big eater. Most of my life I have been considered underweight. A polite way of saying... "skinny"... which was also what I was called more often than not. And, of course, "skinny" is not what a guy wants to be be. Guys aren't skinny. At least, not when I was growing up. Guys had meat on them. So they could show off muscles, not ribs, at the beach. I wore T-shirts at the beach.

But "skinny" was what I was. It was an inheritance from my father. I was told he weighed 140 lbs when he married my mother. He was 6'4". I have seen pictures of him in his 20s... he was definitely "skinny."

Today, we are told, we are experiencing an "epidemic of obesity." Could be true. I see a lot of heavy people out there. And I do mean heavy. Overflowing seats heavy. Scare the bejesus out of "all you can eat" restauranteurs heavy. Fat people.

My mother fought with her weight constantly. She was short, 5'3", and the highest she ever admitted weighing was "a little over 140." A flat out lie even then. Still, she tried diets, eschewed sugar, and tried to lose weight. I can't say I ever saw any positive results. She never hit obese but she stayed what you might call "pleasantly plump" until her later years. She had some health problems, stopped eating, and dropped a bunch of weight. A real "babe" at 78. She gained some of it back in the next several years before she passed away but never got nearly as heavy as she had been.

Why do I bring this up? Well, those guys at the Center for Science in the Public Interest (CSPI) did a study on what's available at restaurants and were, predictably, appalled. I have to agree with them on this to some degree. Restaurants serve portions well above what you need. Well above what I even want. I tend to take half home most of the time.

Extreme Restaurants

Only two of the most egregious violators of common sense are available here in my little town and I don't patronize them anyway. Well, I do stop by Bob Evans once in a great while but that amounts to maybe twice a year and then I eat the half portion meals.

Want to know the best way to lose weight? Savor your food. Eat slowly, very slowly. Chew each bite until the flavor is gone and then swallow. And skip desert 6 days out of 7. Make it a reward for being good. Or a ritual for Sunday evening.

Or break a kneecap and find it too painful to think about food.