I just found out a friend has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. It does not look good. He's not famous, or notable. He's just a man, a good man who once worked with me in San Diego. A man I was happy to call "friend" at the time and have thought of from time to time in the many years since we went our separate ways.
He's fairly young, about my age (it just dawned on me that I do not know his age). He's a Vietnam veteran. A man who was born in Mexico, who came to this country when he was about 14. A man who has had his ups and downs, his triumphs and his failures. A man who worked alongside of me, who attended company schools with me. A man with whom I argued, agreed, joked, shared meals, shared joys and heartaches.
He's a man I defended when he was unofficially, and wrongfully, accused. A man who put up with my pettiness and crankiness as I went through the misery of a failing marriage. A man who understood my happiness and my unhappiness.
A friend. One I have no way of helping in this time of his greatest need. And that is the greatest sadness of all.
A Night Unremembered
13 years ago
9 comments:
That one is a monster my friend. My Mother passed away from that one at the age of 52, roughly 4 days after the passing of her 90 year old Father. Also lost 2 friends between roughly 50 and 55 to that disease. Consequently, I have followed the science on this one fairly closely, and I've had regular checkups to try to determine if I have it. Quite frankly, things haven't improved very much since 1978 when my Mom died. Spend some time with your friend, or pass on some thoughts which you did not previously.
Douglas- Sorry to hear of your friends challenges. I am sure he was lucky to have your friendship in his life.
I do like the new picture by the way.
Alan
Truly, truly sorry to hear about your friend.
Thanks all. I am afraid I am the one who was lucky to have him as a friend. It is to his credit that he stuck with me. I was not so pleasant a person during a good part of our friendship. I could have been a much better friend than I was. Unfortunately, after talking to a mutual friend just a couple of hours ago, the prognosis is worse than I had first learned. They caught this very late. It had already spread.
Log - You are wise to keep a close eye on things.
Douglas, I am very sorry to hear about this; and I wish I had something intelligent to say, but I have no words of wisdom for you at all.
I'm sorry.
Pearl
Pearl - Don't feel bad. I am also at a loss of words at times like these. I never know what to say when someone else is faced with a pending loss (or has suffered such a loss) and now I am equally struck dumb. I know there is nothing I can do for him, I know he has daughters looking after him, I know he has friends nearby who can sit with him. I also know he is like me, unwilling to accept a fuss made over him. He is 3000 miles away from me and I feel completely helpless.
Douglas, true friends are hard to find, they are even harder to lose. My thoughts with you.
AV
AV - Thank you. But my suffering is nothing important. I will heal. German's will not. If there was away to swap places, or to share the suffering, I would gladly do it.
My best friend has heart problems. He's secretive about himself, but about those problems especially. It worries me, and it saddens me to think that one day, I might be informed of some news similar to what you received. I really am sorry, but you can go see him, right? Talk to him? Just cherish and love.
Michael.
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